One afternoon after Fershta and her sisters returned home from school, their father told them he had decided to sell them, one by one, by having them engaged to be married.
The family’s economic situation was very bad so the father, an uneducated man without a job, determined the way to get money was to find husbands for each of his eight daughters. No longer would they be allowed to attend school. No longer would they get an education.
Fershta, the oldest, was engaged first at age fifteen. The father never spoke to Fershta or her mother about this. And so it came to be that Fershta was married to Maroof, who had no education or job, just like her father.
After the wedding, life became very bad for Fershta. Her husband hit her every day. Her mother-in-law also beat her, telling Fershta they had paid for her and now she was the family servant. From morning til night every day, Fershta washed clothing and dishes and did much work around the house. At night her husband came home and hit her. This continued after Fershta became pregnant. Fershta lost the pregnancy due to the beatings.
Because things had gotten so bad, Fershta’s mother, who accused Maroof of killing his own baby, brought her daughter home to take care of her, telling Maroof that Fershta would return to him when she recovered. The family could not say anything else to Maroof because they were so poor.
But about a week later, Maroof appeared at the house during lunch, saying he’d come to bring Fershta home. He was offered lunch. This is when life changed forever for Fershta and her family.
Maroof became angry, took out his knife, and tried to kill Fershta. She ran away. Then Maroof went after Fershta’s father and mother, attacking them both with the knife. The mother called to Fershta’s seven-year-old brother Reza, warning him to run from the house. Maroof chased the little boy, stabbing him with the knife. It was a tragic scene for Fershta’s mother, who was injured and couldn’t help as Reza called for her and then died.
Fershta’s parents were taken to the hospital for surgery. Her mother was badly injured and the sisters had to collect money to pay for blood transfusions. They were able to save their mother, but she was filled with sadness afterwards. The mother’s heart burned with sorrow as she looked at Reza’s clothes and thought about her innocent little son, killed in front of her, while the man who did this crime was safe and not even being searched for. Fershta’s mother could hardly bear the pain of losing her little boy, especially knowing the murderer was free and not even punished.
Now, Fershta says her family blames her for Reza’s death. She can’t face them and she worries about her husband returning to harm them. She believes she has suffered because she is uneducated. She is seventeen now, and she lost her childhood due to her father’s bad behavior. She lost her marriage because of her in-laws. And she lost her motherhood because of her terrible husband.
What will happen to Fershta, this young girl who has lost so much?
By Leeda
AWWP’s writing on child marriage is being shared with Breakthrough’s campaign, “Nation Against Early Marriage.” Photo by Paula Bronstein /Getty Images.
thank you leeda for telling us the sad story of fershta and her family….. i hope her mother will remember her love for her daughter and stop blaming her for reza’s death…. fershta’s husband is to blame… and in a lesser way, so is her father, for selling her to this mean family..
i wish fershta and her sisters a happy life, a good future… but i fear for them…
Leeda, thank you for sharing this horrific yet powerful story and for telling it so plainly and eloquently.
Oh Leeda… what a devastating story. Fershta has suffered so horribly. I am deeply sorry for everything she has gone through. I wish we could, at the very, very least, get her a notebook and encourage her to write about everything that has happened, and her feelings, even if she burns each page after she writes it, just to get it all down, and to experience the therapy, and the realizations, and breakthroughs that happen when we write about the trauma. Some call it writing “through” the trauma. And not that anyone is magically healed just by writing about their pain, but if you write long enough, you might have that small moment when you realize what must be your next step.
You have done a beautiful and kind thing chronicling her story. Thank you for this.
Stacy
I pray that something positive will happen in Fershta’s life. Too much sadness and pain for one person to bear alone. Thank you for sharing the story so Fershta’s is not alone but has many thinking and praying for her.
This is a tragic story. To think of poverty so extreme.
To think of a father’s disregard of his daughters’ emotions so completely. To think of a man so violent that he would kill a child and try to kill the parents, after so terribly abusing his wife. I hope there is some help for Fershta, for her mother, and perhaps even a tiny opening in the father’s heart.
Is there anyway to conact this girls?
Maybe to teach them online?
There a possibilities, we have to use them!
Praying is the First step, but actions And Education will help more!
Greetings
Agree, but to my believe at this point the only help could be financial-aid to this family.
Regards,
Humaira a.
Fershta is a survivor. She may be unaware of this and feel guilty for the trauma brought about by her marriage to a pig and forced to live with other pigs, but she is pure, she has not been tainted with ignorance and she will grow be a good mother herself one day. Fershta is not to blame for her brothers death. Her husband is to blame. He wished to control her to defeat her spirit and when that failed he realised he wasn’t the boss of her he turned on her family. Go sister, smell the roses, rise above the pain and remember Fershta, you are free.
Very great job Leeda, well done! it may or may not have any effect on Freshta’s life, particularly, but I believe such works will definitely have a significant impact on other young girls and families such as Freshta’s… Thank you for raising Freshta’s voice! Our thoughts are with her, and I pray Freshta’s life get better, at least she could live a normal life 😐
Humaira a.
Very great job Leeda, well done! it may or may not have any effect on Freshta’s life, particularly, but I believe such works will definitely have a significant impact on other young girls and families such as Freshta’s… Thank you for raising Freshta’s voice! Our thoughts are with her, and I pray Freshta’s life get better, at least she could live a normal life 😐
Humaira a.
rightly said
Nicely written though such incidents are quite normal and regular in our country unfortunately
Thank-you, Leeda. Putting such events onto paper is very difficult. My prayers are with you and with Fershta and her family.
Leeda, thank you for being a voice for Fershta. Thank you Fershta for telling your story. I am so sorry that you and your family have suffered brutality and loss, and I’m also sorry that you are also feeling alone and abandoned. Cowards use guns and knives to keep those who they feel threatened by in fear. Your weapon is your VOICE and your PEN! You are in my thoughts and prayers. Your story and your pain is no longer your own to bear. All I can say for you to do is WRITE ON!
با سلام خدمت جامعه نویسندگان زن افغان
اول اینکه من به عنوان یک پسر جوان ایرانی علی رغم اینکه از فضای داخل جامعه افغانستان اگاهی چندانی ندارم اما همیشه از کوشش زنان افغان برای رسیدن به حقوقشان لاجرم احساس افتخار میکنم هر چند هم که این کار تحت سلطه استعمار غرب ممکن باشد البته که استعمار هم به هر شکلی که باشد غیر قابل قبول است چه برای من و چه برای همسایه من
داستان زنان خردسال و رنج کشیده مانند فرشته بزرگوار نه تازه است و نه تکراری
اینگونه فجایع قرن هاست که مرتبا تکرار میشوند و قطعا هر کسی از شنیدن انها به سختی ناراحت میشود.
اما در این میان سوالی که ذهن مرا به خود مشغول میکند اینست که واقعا چرا هر جا که اسلام هست بیماری فقر و فحشا در ان بیداد میکند؟
از طرفی دیگر در این گونه جوامع علی رغم فقر شدید مردم سایه استعمار همواره سنگینی میکرده !!! واقعا دلیل اینکه در قرن بیست و یکم چنین فجایعی روز به روز بیشتر میشود چیست؟استعمار یا تعصبات قدیمی مردم؟
من صمیمانه تقاضا دارم پا ک بانوان افغان به این سوال پاسخ بدهند
چون این به نظر من همان سایه سیاهیست که گوشه ای از اسمان زندگی انها را پوشانده
قبلا از حسن نظر و پاسخ گویی شما سپاس گزارم
may she find strength in the recesses of her mind… where she thought it was all gone… in a small cavity somewhere… enough strength to get through today. and tomorrow, for tomorrow… the strength of many behind her, if only she knew… but it is there, still… may she feel our yearning for her, and be comforted. and sweet remembrance of little reza, so innocent and young… those who are truly living mourn the loss of this child… may we all learn to find peace within ourselves. If you think it’s impossible, it may be important to believe in. Because if you don’t, who will?