My husband once had a friend who fell in love with his cousin. Her name was Husna and she also loved him.
Both families were happy about this relationship, but not the girl’s uncles. Husna’s family was rich and her uncles wanted her to marry one of their sons. But the couple married anyway by escaping to Nadim’s village in Panjshir province.
When they returned to Kabul after several days, both families accepted the marriage, except for her uncles. They still wanted her for their sons because of her father’s wealth.
After only one month of marriage, the uncles murdered the boy. Husna was a widow for some months, but then the family insisted she must marry again.
She was several months’ pregnant. According to bad customs that are often followed in Afghanistan, they married her with her younger brother-in-law, even though this boy loved another girl. They married and soon Husna gave birth to a baby girl. Then, her second husband decided to marry the girl he had loved for many years.
In this real-life story that happened just a year and a half ago, three lives were ruined. But among them, it is the girl who was the victim of bad traditions. First, she wanted to marry the person she loved, but when she did so, her husband was murdered out of greed. When she became a widow, her in-laws insisted on deciding her future and selected for her a new life partner, even though Islam clearly grants every person the right to select their life partner.
People who follow these bad tribal traditions are not completely aware of what Islam says about human rights.
Why must there be so much suffering for females? If the men can choose whom to marry, then females should be allowed to do the same.
God created the first woman, Bibi Hawa, from a left rib of Baba Adam in order for man and woman to be equal. Otherwise God could have created her from the feet of Adam so she would always serve him and have no rights.
By Rabia A.
Photo by Majid Saeedi.